How Do You Heal?

09/17/2023

You Destroyed me

I wish I could truly talk about what you did without making you seem like a bad person. Do I hate you? I know I say it sometimes but, it’s far from the truth. Really, I hate how easy it was for you to destroy this dainty heart of mine. How can anyone move on from something like that? I don’t have the answers for myself. Trust me. I have been searching. It is a year later and that heaviness still sits in my heart. I am so grateful that I gave love a chance but everywhere I turn, I am reminded how bad my heart is still bleeding.

Insecurities

I have dreams. I have nightmares. I am constantly reminded of the hurt. Instead of just that reminder though, it’s turned into a nightmare where i’m made to believe I am not good enough. A feeling that when I open my heart to love, it’ll be proven again that I am not worthy of any love. I don’t know what is wrong with me. I don’t know why I let this cut me so deeply. Maybe it roots from my childhood but, it’s like someone giving you the answer you have been needing. Instead of saying “I found a cure” they say, “only you can answer this for yourself.” So, how do you heal what you didn’t break? How do you know where to start? How can you find what made the cut so deep in the first place?

I think there is something wrong with me.
I think I need help.